27.6.17

#685 "Let me just stop fighting..I'm not that strong"..


I was raised an optimist. Believe in people, hard work pays off, things will get better…As a slightly nerdy and completely gawky teen, life sucked. classmate cruelty was an unavoidable part of life. 
Those years were painful. It was mind-boggling how mean, how pessimistic, people could be... 
My mother, a textbook optimist, trotted out the usual lines: 
“It’s not you; it’s them.” 
“They’re just jealous.”
“It’ll get better. Just wait.”..
I hid behind alcohol and drugs to numb the pain of feeling... I'm not that strong after-all..
I wanted it to all go away..
Right then, right there, I had a choice to make: Let life lead me, or lead my life.
Reread that last line…
That’s the reason we need to work our tails off to be, and to raise, optimists:
If my parents had been pessimists and expected the worst, I wouldn’t be here today. If my parents had been pessimists, they would have given up on me; in turn, I would have given up on myself. As optimists, they had faith that I would learn, grow, and recover.
I wanted her to be a fighter, to always look for the best in others, to fall down and get back up again—and again, and again.
It’s a struggle to stay positive, and pessimism desperately wants to be BFFs. My negative alter-ego is always sitting on my shoulder, whispering in my ear, “Isn’t life unfair?”
The thing is, life can seem unfair. But.. life got so much easier, and happier, when I learned how to overcome negative thoughts.
Gently, but firmly, tell your partner/mother/best friend/colleague that you can’t participate in their pity party. You know the ones that are always complaining about something in their life. Empathy and compassion are important, but learn how to deal with difficult people... They are bringing you down. Definitely help them, but help them in a positive way. Living bitter-free is a skill... and a hard skill to learn.
Acknowledge and explore feelings of negativity, but don’t dwell on them. 
Turn them around, and set them free...They will thank you one day.

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